Please, stop.

March 19, 2007 at 8:56 pm (stuff)

I watch a lot of television, and I’ve seen a lot of commercials—and sometimes, you just see some really bad commercials…commercials so bad that I’ve made a vow never to use any of these products. So here, for your enjoyments, are the worst three—feel free to expand on the list—

1) Botox – Most pharmaceutical commercials are either remarkably vague or incredibly specific (from people cuddling and watching the sunset for erectile dysfunction, to people discussing in detail their abdominal issues) but this one just made me slap my forehead in disgust. Women, dancing and loving their Botox and/or plans for Botox, while the song “Express Yourself” plays in the background. The thing is, the entire point of Botox is to prevent you from making expressions. Gotta love to hate it.

2) Taco Bell – Dear Taco Bell advertising executives: get a new ad agency. Seriously…the Chihuahua was better than the deplorable crap you have been forcing on viewers lately. The bottom of the barrel involved a young lad espousing the virtues of the “4th Meal”—that’s right America, knowing full well that we are becoming so obese that our life span is actually getting shorter, Taco Bell wants in on the action. They’ve also taken to renaming our food groups for us—how thoughtful! Now I don’t have to worry about those pesky vegetables—but did I get my daily allowance of melty?

3) V-cast phones – Let me get this straight—I’m a stranger to you, just minding my own business, and you approach me, armed with what can politely be called poor taste in music, and you stick you disease-ridden earbuds in my ears. For what? Do you want me to validate your existence? Well, I can’t. I don’t know you, and I don’t want to. Keep your hands to yourself. Freak.

So, please, stop.

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